The end of my high school life >.<

After struggling for 3 weeks of SPM examination....finally spm had come to a fullstop. What we had done is a past....so now lets focus on the things that are ahead of us.

So spm had finally passed and that was also the end of my high school life...after the month of December i will be heading for my National Service camp at Tangkak....i will gonna miss everything here in Johor Bahru and start my new life in Kem Sri Ledang.... I shall commit the following months of my life in GOD's hand...there's nothing that i can do right now but just to have faith in HIM >.<

I'm quite tired now....i don't know whether it's because now i finally can put down the burden that i kept deep within my heart...after chemistry paper 3 while i was heading home...suddenly a terrible headache attacked me....i think its the stress that accumulated throught out spm haha
Although spm was over but my gastritis problem seems to be worsen...hopefuly it won't develop into peptic ulcer....wish me luck bah >.<

Christmas is coming soon....and i'm looking forward to it ^^ Since i was young until now i still love the christmas atmosphere...i love seeing those christmas tree that are lighted up with little glowing lights and decorated with colourful decorattion....But this year i won't be celebrating christmas with Jie...so sad...Haiii Jie the next time we meet will be Chinese New Year bah...don't miss me ok haha ^^

26th of November

This is the day that i will remember throughout my life...

For about 6 years grandma had left us...everything that happened 6 years ago still appear vividly in my mind...

I will never forgive myself for turning away when u opened your eyes to see the world for the last time. I didn't think so much at that moment...all i want is just to let u have a good rest but i didn't know that u left me just like that...i shouldn't have turned away....i really cried my heart out everytime i thought of u...although u broke the promise we made together but i will still work hard to make this promise a reality...

I Love U forever , GRANDMA !!!!

Stress before SPM...

Next Wednesday spm will be begin...i keep telling myself to hang on and be strong to face this examination...and i really have to do it....although i really can't stand all this stress anymore but i believe that GOD will continue to give me strength.

Do you all know that stress really can change a person? I really can feel the changes in me... hopefully i'm not facing depression haha. This is the last week before spm and why are u doing this to me? Seriously i'm really tired but my mind keep on thinking of spm....what will happen to me if i don't get good result? Will my future vanished if i don't get good result? All these questions will keep on appearing in my mind...and i seriously going crazy thinking all of these.

I became more emo, moody this few days. I just trying to be happy and nonchalant in front of my family members but seriously my inner soul wasn't doing so. Jie...did u experience all this before your spm....i think u did right....thats why sometimes u were moody and u ignored me...Jie i finally know how u feel....really sorry for so not understanding last time.

But i will try my best to sit for this examination...if i can get good result hopefully i will get into matric....if not maybe i will be doing faundation in science in Aimst, Kedah before doing medicine...coz i really don't want to waste 2 years in Form 6...so thats the only choice >.<

Jia you....MELISSA u can do it.... GOD is always by your side >.<

The Greatest Love....

The greatest love that i experience in my life is the love from GOD...this love is a wonderful love which cannot be replace by any other people loves towards me....even my parents love will not be as great as that because HE is the one who holds my hand and bring me into this world... if GOD doesn't love me why would HE bring me into this world?

People will start to wonder why am i saying this...actually the things that i wanted to say is that although we can't see HIM or touch HIM but HE really do love everyone of us.

I was really stressed and tired recently...but one day when i was experiencing stress again GOD touched me through sister weiwan. At that very moment, tears started to roll down my eyes... i suddenly feel that GOD is really by my side...HE never leave me a single step...and the most important thing is HE LOVES ME. He passed HIS message through sister weiwan who gave me encouragement to be strong. Every single words that weiwan shared with me through MSN seriously touched me a lot. Thank you sis... I feel that i'm really foolish...trusting things that are temporary and maybe not even true at all and neglecting the thruth....come on MELISSA....wake up.....

All i want to share is that whenever we faced with difficulties in life, try to turn to GOD, seek guidance from HIM, and lastly follow and trust whatever HE said.

'GOD Loves Everyone of us...'

Spm is coming soon....

Another 42 more days to go, the days left before spm are getting lesser, lesser and lesser....spm will be coming real soon. Am i prepared for this examination?? I seriously don't know... Stress and pressure level in me are increasing day by day...My headache and gastritis problems are getting worst day by day....what should i do???

7 days a week, 24 hours a day...will it be enough for me to do my last revision before spm??? I really very afraid of this exam as it will determine my future...i really want to follow Jie's footsteps but the problem is i'm not as smart as she is :(

I can't stand it anymore.....

God....please tell me what should i do? I really can't stand it anymore....and i really wonder how long would i survive???? Maybe i'm too weak and sensitive with everything that are happening around me...but what should i do...should i just ignore everything and pretend nothing happened? But how can i ignore it? I'm not dead...i'm really frustrated now. I even vent all my frustration on a poor little volly ball during PJ lessons hahaha...thats what Chua taught me to do ^^ but my hands are seriously painfull after doing that....so i think that is not a good idea...hmmm

Everyone including family members and friends told me to forget and ignore everythings that happened but i really can't do it....whenever i think about it...tears will start to roll down from my eyes....i really hate myself for going through all this...but i have no choice as all this are already written in the book of life. But none of you have been through this....no one will understand what i feel right now....only God knows. What do he want somemore....i really don't have the intention to compare my marks with him....all i want is to acheive all A's in my trial exam...but why do he still want to compare with me....he is already so smart and intelligent and defeating me in most of the subjects....isn't that enough?? Or you want me to die in front of you and vanish in this world only you will be satisfied??

Be strong....be strong....this is the word that i keep reminding myself....but can i do it? I really don't know...God please help me....

Family gathering ^^

I had abundant this blog for a long long time...so its time to update ^^

Last friday night Jie finally came back from Penang....daddy and i went to pick her up at the airport....both of us were dozzing off while waiting for jie...^^

Since jie is back...we had a family gathering at a nearby korean restaurant. Too bad mummy had missed all the good foods haha. Here are some pictures we took during the dinner.

*Makan time

*Jie...you better eat as much as u can or else when you go back to Penang you will not have the chance to eat all this good food again ^^

*After dinner it was chit chat time and we even had free yakult drink from the restaurant owner